News of the Weird - 2

This from Chuck Shepherd's section in the Chicago Reader:

A new UK lottery game called "Cool Cash" was canceled earlier this month after less than a week of play because the arithmetic involved proved [to be] too difficult. Participants were required to compare a temperature visible on the game card to a second temperature hidden behind a scratch-off panel; if the second temperature was lower, the card was a winner.

Doesn't sound so hard yet, does it?

But in accordance with the game's winter theme, many of the temperatures were below zero, and officials said they received numerous complaints from players who couldn't understand why, for example, -5 wasn't lower than -6.

To quote directly from a blindsided victim that the Manchester Evening News interviewed:

On one of my cards it said I had to find temperatures lower than -8. The numbers I uncovered were -6 and -7 so I thought I had won, and so did the woman in the shop. But when she scanned the card the machine said I hadn't. I phoned Camelot and they fobbed me off with some story that -6 is higher - not lower - than -8 but I'm not having it. I think Camelot are giving people the wrong impression - the card doesn't say to look for a colder or warmer temperature, it says to look for a higher or lower number. Six is a lower number than 8. Imagine how many people have been misled.

And this is in the United Kingdom? God bless the Queen.

The Comin' of the Cousin

Joss was first. I don't mean that to sound territorial. She just was. She was (obviously), the first child in our little family. But she is also the first grandchild. And thus spoiled.

Now, some of us gotta share our love. And that's quite all right and fits in neatly with our Christianity.

We are eagerly awaiting (on pins and needles... so to say) the birth of li'l Chloe, Joss's first cousin (although she's met and made many friends already who we expect to remain life-long friends and fam).

Look forward to sharing pix (esp if we can get some of the two of 'em together. Double your pleasure with Doublemint Dyes) and news.

Update!:
7 lbs., 5 ozs. Got the call at 9:55 pm, CST.
They're in north Jersey.
Poor daddy sounded tired. I know for sure that mama was too.
Hopefully, we can post something up by the weekend.
I'm so excited!

War is Hell. Football is Forever*

One of the best places to get sports news is The Onion. It's one of the fresher spots in that periodical nowadays, and actually takes the issue of sports seriously, while still skewering modern American culture and being genuinely funny. Case in point:

U.S. Military Wasting All Its Victories On Notre Dame

"It's important to realize that our young men have been fighting pitched battles against religious fanatics who have been brainwashed into a culture that seeks to destroy all other ways of life," Air Force head coach Troy Calhoun said Monday. "That's just the way Notre Dame football is, the way it's always been. You can't reason with people like that. You destroy them as completely, remorselessly, and quickly as you can."

In other football-related news, the Bears came from behind yesterday to beat the Broncos in overtime. So, with a win over the Giants next weekend, we're still [hardly] in the playoff picture.

And, finally, in my fantasy football leagues (where I merely pretend to do something football-related), I will not, repeat, will not cease to suck. Adrian Peterson, I could've used another miracle.

*Patton. I swear.

What's Been Going On?

• Y'know, it's impossible to live on a budget when you don't have any idea of how much money you're going to take home in a given week.
• I'm really upset (still) about my last job. I felt I was mislead and that my loyalty was not returned. Loyalty in the workforce (unless you work for the New England Patriots) not only seems to be ignored, but punished as well. Another family member was recently laid off as his company is in the process of cutting corners (something my employer is always doing), even though he turned down a better job offer (much closer to home, better salary) to remain with that place. It was a tough day before he found out that the other offer was still waiting for him. I turned down offers (directly and indirectly), believing that something bigger was waiting for me at my last place. It wasn't. I was and am hurt. I hope that my gravy train will be coming in soon though.
• One positive effect is that I've had more time to spend with Joss (more on that later) and the Mrs. Both of whom I am crazy about. The commute was never nice to me and now I usually get to see them a bit more before and definitely after work (often Joss would be in bed or preparing for bed when I got home). Some days I spend the whole day with them.
  
• Today I took a four hour nap. I needed that.
  

Weird News of tWeek

It would not surprise that the biggest bureaucracy in the world would try some tricks that Wal-Mart has perfected (even if Wal-Mart didn't originate them):

After 2,600 member of Minnesota's National Guard completed the longest deployment served by any ground combat unit - 22 months, including an extension for the summer "surge" - nearly half of them found they didn't qualify for... [the GI Bill. The Bill] provides [federal education] benefits to any serviceperson on active duty for 730 days, but according to numerous local news accounts in October, the written orders for 1,162 guard members specified a tour lasting only 729.

editor's note: The local alt-weekly The Reader is a great read. If I manage to consume no other literary piece during the week, you can always bet that I've all but devoured this little bag of goodies by early Saturday. This little tidbit (and hopefully some other future filler) was lifted from a section tucked away in their classifieds called News of the Weird, or something like that. I believe an earlier entry was also taken from there. So, hopefully I can do this on a weekly basis, if nothing else.