Update

• Yes, the Bulls lost the first two games to Detroit in some doozies. And without a brawl to write home to mommy about. Yet, we still have faith in 'em in Chicago. Win tonight, or start a fight. I don't care if Zeke is in NY now.
• We're looking for a new apartment in the range of two-to-three bedrooms for under a thousand a month -which is difficult in Chicago. This would save us a lot of money that we'll need once the baby is born and we switch to a one-income family. It's too bad, though, since we really made this little cozy place our own and fallen in love with it. And the move will probably happen a couple weeks after the baby's born. Yeah, I know, I know. Not cool. Dread these summer-babies, though. Should've planned the pregnancy around the lease.
  
• Taking a grad school program for teachers nearby. Like the saying goes, "Takes money to make money to burn money."
  
• I'm also looking for a new school to teach at (more on that in the next month or just after).
  
• Summer blockbusters (or semi- or pseudo-blockbusters) that I've seen without the wife so far: 2. Watch the tally rise. But for now, all I'll say is, a little disappointed in both Spider-Man III (as you're probably aware by now, too much happening; but then again, I plan on seeing it again and maybe again) and in Hot Fuzz (which I thought was a tad disrespectful to the genre it was trying to pay hommage to by interspersing it with a genre the filmmakers had already masterfully spoofed - goredom). If you missed the first, you're dead. Or my wife. According to the box office returns at least. If you missed the second, and can handle a bit of gore-ish violence (actually, not too much), you need a good laugh. Watch it (and while you're at it, rent Shaun of the Dead. Again.)
  

And this is for the Gators winning EVERYTHING!!

At least something's going right in this world.

Bulls.
Keep 'em comin'!

This is for request. And because I think it's funny.

Moderate graf

As I was riding the bus the other day and trying to avoid eye-contact (while people-gazing nevertheless. It's like a game. I try to keep my ring in full-view and not gawk at people. It's interesting. You should try it.) I caught an ad for the Illinois Dept. of Rev. They want citizens to e- their tax returns. Which, I suppose, is cool. Less paperwork, right? (Marginally.) The ad read: Want taxes to be less taxing? The perfectly legible penciled-in graffiti underneath read: Vote Republican.

Probably the first instance of neo-con graffiti that I've ever seen. Which I think is interesting. Most graf that I catch is polar in its essence. There is the very conservative gang graffiti that says, this is our area, our block, our marker, stay out non-locals/non-us. There is the very liberal tagging which says that all property is public property and therefore also my property - and I have the right to mark the world with my name. Yet, even amongst those distinctives, there are shades of moderation. One of the most prolific taggers in my neighborhood goes by the nom-de-plum Jimmy Carter. Huge letters. Just a tad bit fancy. But also perfectly legible. On mailboxes all over the general Logan Square neighborhood. The southern farmer/ex-President/humanitarian is making a public-yet-restrained-yet-illegal comeback as a street chameleon.

I wonder if the Jimmy Carter guy and the Vote Republican guy ever met. And what would they say to each other. Would they engage in a lively debate about the necessity of individual rights v. corporate rights. Over earning v. living wages. Education. Etc.

Or would they just pull out their markers and try to scribble on each other as fast as they can, in the tradition of the Old West, as many moderates secretly love to imagine themselves resolving conflicts.

Let's Play Catch-Up!

• Apparently, Ol' Bessie (aka, Cheap Acer - the term-of-no-endearment Mrs. jasdye gave her) was running on empty. The old hard drive just ain't what it used to be. An expensive inpatient stay at the Geek Squad informed me of that. Now I have to try to figure if I want to spend another couple bills fixing her or just start from scratch and buy a more reliable machine. Which I may or may not take with me to work (why should I endanger my machine for their work?, I keep asking myself. To no avail. I make a lousy conversationalist). In any case, I'm really concerned about my iTunes. Can I transfer all those tunes via my iPod into another computer? How does that work with the DRM's? Does anybody know? Stupid, stupid, stupid. I need to back everything up from now on out eight times over.
• I also lost my phone. I'm turning into Homer Simpson in things digital. Funny thing is, I haven't stored most of the numbers there anywhere else and I barely remember my own number. AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!! I'm such a block-head.
• Mrs. jasdye and I have been looking for a new church now for a bit. Which has been hard for me, since my old church is like family. Old family, in quite a few cases. But, we're both really liking this church. It's about a mile from our house, it's multi-cultural (in some ways more so than our last - which is hard to find in the Evangelical tradition), has a congregation that is social/economically-mixed (also like our last church - with a mixture of homeless, yuppies, college students, hipsters, etc.), is laid back but mixes high-church liturgy (which is a mix that I'm pretty comfortable with and have been trying to get my old church to embrace), and speaks our language in terms of the redemptive work of God in the whole of the world through Jesus' death and resurrection. The one weak spot that we've noticed is that we would be considered in the older end of the church's spectrum, that being a very small window for the most part. But, like ourselves, it seems like the church is also booming out some babies and young'uns. So, we'll see and try to keep posted.

I think my poor computer's about as exhausted as I am, or would be, if I didn't take some much needed (and for once, well-timed) breaks this week.

Taught the night at the youth group. Had a blast. Miss the rugrats. I couldn't even imagine giving a half-hour lecture to my own students and them being anywhere near as attentive. Ok, I was given twenty minutes, but another thing I couldn't imagine is even broaching this massive subject matter in only a third of an hour, unless it was as an introduction to a series.

I felt a bit like I was just rushing, just trying to throw stuff on the wall and see what sticks where. My boy Tankie - who's often been my silent sounding board - came through and encouraged me that at least someone carried away something from it.

And now for the final installment:
Isaiah 54

1 "Sing, O childless woman! Break forth into loud and joyful song, O Jerusalem, even though you never gave birth to a child. For the woman who could bear no children now has more than all the other women," says the LORD. 2 "Enlarge your house; build an addition; spread out your home! 3 For you will soon be bursting at the seams. Your descendants will take over other nations and live in their cities. 4 "Fear not; you will no longer live in shame. The shame of your youth and the sorrows of widowhood will be remembered no more, 5 for your Creator will be your husband. The LORD Almighty is his name! He is your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel, the God of all the earth.

11 "O storm-battered city, troubled and desolate! I will rebuild you on a foundation of sapphires and make the walls of your houses from precious jewels. 12 I will make your towers of sparkling rubies and your gates and walls of shining gems. 13 I will teach all your citizens, and their prosperity will be great. 14 You will live under a government that is just and fair.

55

1"Is anyone thirsty? Come and drink - even if you have no money! Come, take your choice of wine or milk � it's all free! 2 Why spend your money on food that does not give you strength? Why pay for food that does you no good? Listen, and I will tell you where to get food that is good for the soul! 3 "Come to me with your ears wide open. Listen, for the life of your soul is at stake. I am ready to make an everlasting covenant with you. I will give you all the mercies and unfailing love that I promised to David. 4 He displayed my power by being my witness and a leader among the nations. 5 You also will command the nations, and they will come running to obey, because I, the LORD your God, the Holy One of Israel, have made you glorious."...

8 "My thoughts are completely different from yours," says the LORD. "And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. 9 For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts. 10 "The rain and snow come down from the heavens and stay on the ground to water the earth. They cause the grain to grow, producing seed for the farmer and bread for the hungry. 11 It is the same with my word. I send it out, and it always produces fruit. It will accomplish all I want it to, and it will prosper everywhere I send it. 12 You will live in joy and peace. The mountains and hills will burst into song, and the trees of the field will clap their hands! 13 Where once there were thorns, cypress trees will grow. Where briers grew, myrtles will sprout up. This miracle will bring great honor to the LORD's name; it will be an everlasting sign of his power and love.

What does the resurrection of the Messiah mean for everybody else?

A whole new world! The mountains are running and skipping, the trees are clapping, the rocks will cry out, etc., etc. A small band of people from a "backwards" nation will eventually broaden their scope, become emboldened enough to die horrible deaths proclaiming the death and resurrection of their leader (in the promised hope that they too will be resurrected), gain thousands, tens of thousands, eventually millions and now billions of followers, topple the mighty Roman Empire, heal the sick, comfort the fatherless and widows, cuddle burn-victims, AIDS victims, lepers, establish and run hospitals.

Yes, many horrible things were done by Christians and in the name of Jesus. But those atrocities are more results of being broken and self-centered than of living in and through the resurrection. More a result of having as Lord Caesar and wealth than Jesus. More a result of neglecting our God and our neighbor in favor of self-interests, rather than loving the Lord our God with all our hearts, souls, minds and loving our neighbors as we love ourselves.

And maybe the first step for many of us, in confronting the power of the resurrection, is to step back, reflect, apologize. And then make amends.

You see, a ghost doesn't have a body

So [the women] rushed back from the tomb to tell his eleven disciples - and everyone else - what had happened... But the story sounded like nonsense to the men, so they didn't believe it. However, Peter jumped up and ran to the tomb to look. Stooping, he peered in and saw the empty linen wrappings,; then he went home again, wondering what had happened.

Luke 24:9, 11-12

Mary was standing outside the tomb crying, and as she wept, she stooped and looked in. She saw two white-robed angels, one sitting at the head and the other at the foot of the place where the body of Jesus had been lying. "Dear woman, why are you crying?" the angels asked her.
"Because they have taken away my Lord," she replied, "and I don't know where they have put him."
She turned to leave and saw someone standing there. It was Jesus, but she didn't recognize him. "Dear woman, why are you crying?" Jesus asked her, "Who are you looking for?"
She thought he was the Gardener. "Sir," she said, "if you have taken him away, tell me where you have put him, and I will go and get him."
"Mary!" Jesus said.
She turned to him and cried out, "Rabboni!"
"Don't cling to me," Jesus said, "for I haven't yet ascended to the Father. But go find my brothers and tell them that I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God." Mary Magdalene found the disciples and told them, "I have seen the Lord!" Then she gave them his message.

John 20:11-18

Then the two from Emmaus told their story of how Jesus had appeared to them as they were walking along the road, and how they had recognized him as he was breaking the bread. And just as they were telling about it, Jesus himself was suddenly standing there among them. "Peace be with you," he said. But the whole group was startled and frightened, thinking they were seeing a ghost!
"Why are you frightened?" he asked. "Why are your hearts filled with doubt? Look at my hands. Look at my feet. You can see that it's really me. Touch me and make sure that I am not a ghost, because ghosts don't have bodies, as you see that I do." As he spoke, he showed them his hands and his feet.
Still they stood there in disbelief, filled with joy and wonder.

Luke 35-37

The gotcha-ness of the Resurrection.

The four canonical Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke and John), for all their different versions of the same story - which has left skeptics wondering why Christians would believe in these muddled accounts in the first place - all record the same reaction from his followers after his resurrection. Male, female, close disciples, Roman guards, and nameless followers all are shaken and fearful upon seeing him, or rather, seeing his body where it shouldn't have been. It was as if Scooby and Shaggy had stumbled unto another one of their ghosts. Except that this was no cheap monster suit, no illusion, and was a first-experience.

The angels' response is similar to Jesus'. Their first words in all their encounters tend to be "Peace" or "Don't be afraid." Although Jesus did seem to walk through walls, I don't think that the response was necessary because people were afraid (as has been suggested by well-meaning Christians) of the awesome size and muscular size of the angels or that Jesus appeared as a ghost. Notice Mary Magdelene's response to the "white-robed angels" and her desperate plea to the gardener. It was more that Jesus was missing from his tomb, his place of death, and instead appearing in front of them.

He should be there, in the tomb he was just placed in. Not missing. And certainly not walking in on meetings.

Yet, it wasn't as if the disciples had no primer on this. They knew about, and many of them clung to the hope of, the resurrection, that the dead shall raise from and beyond the scope of death - bodies and all. I'm pretty sure that they were also getting used to the idea of a Messiah (a Jewish savior who would deliver the Israelites from all captivity) who's dirt poor, who's humble, riding on a donkey's colt. And Jesus himself had warned them (at least three times directly) that he would die and yet rise again.

But you could say all that preparation would only come into play later, after the events themselves. For there was nothing in the schema of the world to prepare them for this. This was all new. No one was prepared for the resurrection to begin now. They anticipated a military victory - a toppling of the power of Rome - before a defeat of their hopes and dreams and lives. They didn't understand, yet, the ways of the power of God. And, in many cases, neither do you nor especially I.

This is all new.

And... Discuss!

The rain and snow come down from the heavens
and stay on the ground to water the earth.
They cause the rain to grow,
producing seed for the farmer
and bread for the hungry.
It is the same with my word.
I send it out, and it always produces fruit.
It will accomplish all I want it to,
and it will prosper everywhere I send it.
You will live in joy and peace.
The mountains and hills will burst into song,
and the trees of the field will clap their hands!
Where once there were throns, cypress trees will grow.
Where nettles grew, myrtles will sprout up.
These events will bring great honor to the Lord's name;
they will be an everlasting sign of his power and love.

Isaish 55:10-13 [New Living Translation]

I will only say this much right now (for lack of sleep and time), just reviewing chapters 52-56:
I am amazed at how much Jesus, the Gospel writers, and John's Revelation relies on the images seemingly centralized here. One I just noticed the other day (to kind of tip my hand in the direction I may or may not head), is the correlation between the 11th verse here and the picture of Jesus produced in the first chapter of John, culminating with his resurrection and vindication.

Let's play a game. What other such correlations do you notice?

Resurrection life

Easter would hardly have been, for two thousand years, the spring and center of Christian life and prayer, would hardly have provided the focus of Christian worship and the form of Christian hope, if the word Easter were simply the name of something that once happened in the past.

Nicholas Lash, Easter in Ordinary
(source)

I'm going to do a little teaching on Thursday night to my old youth group. I miss teaching in the Church context. But at the same time, I feel like this time right now, God is teaching me so much and that my vocation is only beginning to be illuminated. And I feel a bit shaken. Like there's so little I know, even though I've been a Christian for some 26 years. I feel a bit of trembling and shaking.

I'm going to be drawing largely on N. T. Wright (largely The Challenge of Jesus) and Eugene Peterson (in this case, almost exclusively Living the Resurrection) to talk about the resurrection of Jesus (spiritual, intellectual and physical new life-after-death) and his followers and what that means in day-to-day life (hint: it has nothing to do with the Left Behind books or why we should fight for or against anybody in the Middle East [militaristically, that is]).

Please stay tuned for further ruminations throughout the week. Both of you.

And on the seventh day...

God rested from his work. And God blessed the seventh day and declared it holy.
Genesis 2:2-3

Now there was a good and righteous man named Joseph. He was a member of the Jewish high council, but he had not agreed with the decision and actions of the other religious leaders. He was from the town of Arimathea in Judea, and he was waiting for the Kingdom of God to come. He went to Pilate and asked for Jesus' body. Then he took the body down from the cross and wrapped it in a long sheet of linen cloth and laid it in a new tomb that had been carved out of rock. This was done late on Friday afternoon, the day of preparation, as the Sabbath was about to begin.
As his body was taken away, the women from Galilee followed and saw the tomb where his body was placed. Then they went home and prepared spices and ointments to anoint his body. But by the time they were finished the Sabbath had begun, so they rested as required by the law.
Luke 23:50-56

My wife and I, after a ridiculous week for her, stayed in bed today til 6. PM.
Now, as I've said earlier, Jesus is in the middle of starting a new covenant, but today is what we could call the eye of the hurricane. Rest now, for tomorrow marks new life.

(If I may be so bold as to suggest reading Isaiah 54-55 if you're feeling froggy.)

Citations from New Living Translation.

Gooood Friday, World!*

From The Gospel According to Matthew, Chapter 27, beginning in verse 27:

Some of the governor's soldiers took Jesus into their headquaters and called out the entire regiment. They stripped him and put a scarlet robe on him. They wove thorn branches into a crown and put it on his head, and they placed a reed stick in his right hand as a scepter. Then they knelt before him in mockery and taunted, "Hail! King of the Jews!" And they spit on him and grabbed the stick and struck him on the head with it. When they were finally tired of mocking him, they took off the robe and put his own clothes on him again. Then they led him away to be crucified.**

The type of new covenant that Jesus was sharing in stories and proclamations with his people - first century Jews - was expressed as the coming of a kingdom. The Kingdom of Heaven/God. It's upon you, he would say; it's like a returning, like a coming back from exile, like a homecoming for a wayward son; it starts out small and will grow like a huge tree where all the birds can nest; it's a party for the poor, diseased, crippled, vagrants, prostitutes and anyone else that wants in; it will be like the end of this world, and the beginning of a new one; it'll be cosmic, on the scale 0f stars falling from the sky and the sun turning red; every knee will bow to the King - including, by inference, Caesars, governors and provincial rulers like Herod and Pontius Pilate.

Many Jews loved this part of the story, including - maybe especially - the Pharisees. They were anticipating it even, trying to purify themselves and their country of infidelity (sound familiar?) to prepare the way of the Lord. They were looking forward to the fulfillment of Isaiah's prophecy, to the perfection of the Word. What the leaders found so unnerving is that this utterly powerless, homeless, seemingly passive (turn the other cheek, the violent try to take it by force, etc.) was declaring that the Kingdom would happen through him. He referenced himself as the Son of God and the Temple. It was obvious he was taking away from their base of power by his miracles and food and stories and wisdom.

So, the leaders (the usually feuding Pharisees and Sadducees - who weren't so happy about upsetting the Roman power structure as the Pharisees - as well as priests, scribes, etc.) came up with a plan. They captured Jesus and brought him to the Roman government. They then charged him with a half-truth: This man is an insurrectionist by claiming that he is the King of the Jews. According to the account given in the Gospel According to John, when Pilate tried to release the popular man, the leaders countered that Jesus' claims to be the King of the Jews was a threat to the power of Caesar. In this, they were correct.

In fact, though, today as I looked over the passage in Matthew 27, I was struck by how little that threat meant to the occupying forces. They weren't just mocking Jesus by calling him and enacting scenes with him, on the cross and in his torture, the "King of the Jews." They were mocking the Jews and their supposedly backward nation, as well as all that they held dear (to my ears, though, I hear traces of Abu Ghraib). Over the next several generations, the Romans would tear apart the land of the Jews and scatter them. But now those who watched over the land (as occupying forces are wont to do) felt little more than contempt for such a puny, little, insignificant, backwards nation that truly believed they were better than anyone else.

The Jews knew this claim to be a massive threat, however, because they believed the promise given to Abraham at the beginning of the old covenant: I will bless you and make you famous, and you will be a blessing to others... All the families on earth will be blessed through you (Genesis 12:2,3). This promise would be repeated and expounded upon in the prophets.

And the saga continues...

*My caveat is that I do not wish for anti-Semitism (or anti-any other people group) or any other such misunderstanding or misinterpretation. Such things are immoral and against the spirit of the whole of the Bible and of the God I worship. With that being said, I'm not trying to offend anyone or make anyone feel threatened or even exclude anyone, but I believe that more illumination is needed, not just hollow political correctness.

**New Living Translation, thank you very much.

Happy Maundy Thursday! Woo-hoo!

From the Gospel According to Matthew, 26th chapter (New Living Translation):

26 As they were eating, Jesus took a loaf of bread and asked God's blessing on it. Then he broke it in pieces and gave it to the disciples, saying, "Take it and eat it, for this is my body." 27 And he took a cup of wine and gave thanks to God for it. He gave it to them and said, "Each of you drink from it, 28 for this is my blood, which seals the covenant between God and his people. It is poured out to forgive the sins of many. 29 Mark my words I will not drink wine again until the day I drink it new with you in my Father's Kingdom." Then they sang a hymn and went out to the Mount of Olives.

photo © 2008 Kim Mc. | more info (via: Wylio)

I'm no biblical scholar, but my understanding is that Jesus is taking forms of an old covenant, an old agreement, between his people and God (of which, remarkably, he is a representative of both, because he's fully both) to establish a new covenant. The old covenant's way of resolving wrongs and trespasses (understood in terms of shed blood and broken bodies of a blemish-free lamb) and of remembrances of where God has brought the people from (the Passover, also celebrated this month, is the immediate context for the meal that Jesus and his disciples were eating for) is being both perfected and completed by the end of the week. In its place, Jesus stands as a testimony to the new testament, the new covenant.

The new covenant, well, we'll get to that shortly.

Smugglers: or How I Have Yet Learned to Stop Worrying and Watch Lord of War and Blood Diamond

A rather short (but still self-involved) treatise on my rushing memories of Lord of War and Blood Diamond:

Two white men make semi-lucrative careers moving guns and goods between despotic warlords in Africa - where leadership is traded like violent payment for long-overdue gambling debts - many of whom exploit pre-adolescents for their impressionable wills and trigger fingers. Under the feigned ignorance of amorality (which doesn't exist) and cries of "meeting a service" (the same cries pushers on the West Side of Chicago mistakenly convince themselves of to cover up their shame in "making a market"), such Lords of War are arming kid energy-led platoons.

One of the child soldiers in BD assumes the nom-de-generation "Baby Killer." As Homer of the Simpsons would implore, "It works on so many levels."

Spoiler Alert!! (??); although I doubt it being that (a) it's pretty obvious to anyone who has seen snippets of it; (b) there's a good chance you may see neither film; (c) neither movie is a thriller, though both may have revelations along the way; (d) you're probably not reading this anyway.

The main difference between these two hung men (played by Nic Cage in LoW and Leonardo DiCaprio in BD) is that DiCaprio's character is slowly changing through the movie (partly led by the most foreign of all film conceits - he's in love). Although he could never directly tell anybody until the last minute, DiCaprio The Actor has to let us in on his character development.
Because of the political motivations behind the makers of LoW, though, Cage's character remains resigned to his role as a knowing cog-in-the-wheel-that-is-bigger-than-he. He remains a willing and winking scapegoat for a government that needs his support. For love of country, for love of money, he's got a duty to do, and he's gonna do it, come hell, high water, or his brother's merciless murder before his eyes. O yeah, don't forget the night with the AIDS-infected supermodels.

Unfortunately, message movies can effectively and affectively pass along much-needed (and sometimes mis-guided) information in such a way that asks us to pause before we act, or cause us to act (Why I didn't check before I bought our wedding rings is probably as good a place to start the self-aggrandizing. Though I suppose prayer, more research and money well-spent would be more appropriate and healthy), they can still contain the stench of lies.

7 songs I'm Digging

I was memed by the Cubicle Reverend (yes, I know it should be the other way around. The Right Reverend Cubicle and his trusty sidekick, Deacon Desk Chair) to list seven songs I'm digging. But because I'm not particularly digging any songs right now (more going through my iPod and finding songs/records I like) and I'm constantly putting together random lists but never thematic ones:

"Dig" - Adam Again - "The earth is hard / the treasure fine."

"LDN" - Lily Allen - The debutante takes a walk around her little neighborhood and digs underneath the glossy visage to discover young men mugging old women, pimps beating their whores, etc., etc.

"Digging in the Dirt" - Peter Gabriel - "Digging in the dirt / find the places we got hurt."

"Chain Gang" - Sam Cooke - "All day long they're singing, ooh, ahh... Been working so hard." And clink and clack to underscore that. Honestly, I think the song's too pretty for such work, but it's got me and my coworkers through many a day of blue collar work back in the day.

"Dig/Dug" - Prayer Chain - I don't have this pre-Mercury album anymore. I'm not sure that's the title anymore. It was pretty much the chorus.

"Water No Get No Enemies" - Fela Kuti - I only assume he's talking about well water.

"I've Got You Under My Skin" - Frank Sinatra - Get 'em out!

So, who to tag? Of all my faithful readers, let's go for Micah (who's always compiling music lists), RC (who almost never talks about music), and - way over in MySpaceville, Timi.

Rednecks and Redstone, Unite

OK.

A couple bits in the free daily yesterday caught my eye. One is that the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff said that homosexuality is immoral - akin to heterosexual adultery - and, therefore, homosexuals shouldn't be allowed in the U.S. military. This was in response to questions about the "Don't Ask / Don't Tell" policy.

A few questions: Is that to imply that anyone who has ever committed adultery should not be allowed in the U.S. military? Or would that be more of a 'grey area' (i.e., if the adulterous affair had stopped within a period of time, or was committed outside of the jurisdiction of the United States, or was done before the parties joined the Forces)? Or, rather, would the implication of adultery ("lust of the eyes") be enough to injunct the wrath of the U.S. Air Force?

But, better question (IMHO): Is the Head of the U.S. Armed Forces - which, in effect, teaches grown men to kill other grown men (and women, and children) - saying that gay people need not show up for the party? That those with a preference for their own gender (or a shared preference) should rightfully be ostracized?

I'm all for morals. But I kinda doubt that the morals of making a living by killing somehow trumps the rights of those who are identified by their sexuality.

The second article that made my eyes bug had to do with Viacom suing YouTube and parent megaCorporation Googe (caveat: Google runs Blogger and Blogspot, as well as my all-time favorite, gmail. So, I don't wanna say anything bad about sweet, sweet Google. Ha ha, Googe!) for running clips from its various networks including, most infamously - at least for me - Stephen Colbert. But this includes stuff from MTV, VH1, Comedy Central, BET, and CBS. I'm sure there's more, but who cares? (They also own Blockbuster, which shows you how generally clueless they are.) And they're suing them for 1,000,000,000 dollars!



But why, o Why, would you want to tear down free publicity?

I'm all against piracy. I'm sorry. I think it's stealing. So, unless the artist comes out and says, 'Get this however you get it' or whatever, I'd rather go through the proper channels and try to pay those who put in the work. But YouTube isn't piracy. It doesn't work (generally speaking) as blanket bootlegging. I could see if they posted entire hour-and-a-half long movies. Maybe. But the sound and visual quality's so bad that, if I could, I would prefer to get them through other, higher-def, channels. But Colbert/The Daily Show, etc., generally isn't available through those channels. And Colbert's earned his name and fame in a way unprecedented 10 years ago.

Through YouTube.

So, it's March and all...

Where's the Madness?

I know it's out there. I just haven't been paying attention.

I know that Duke's likely not to get a berth this year.

That's fairly insane...

But is that it? Is there anything really loco / chemically imbalanced / lunatic going on out there? Is there a chance that some off-the-wall school (not an Xavier. Say a Chicago State or a Bible school with under 1,000 students) gets into the Final Four? Is there an outside chance that a school that doesn't have money for full athletic scholarships will get seed money for these athlete-scholars?

Is there a chance that a school will get recognized not for ridiculing relatively-obscure cultures (meaning, anyone not of their own - read, pasty-White - culture - i.e., urban and Tribal-American), but for lifting every one of its athletes to a 3.0 GPA and a four-year goal plan for graduation?

Yeah, yeah, save the self-righteous rants for Sports Illustrated (which will still rank in millions while it defies the NCAA - while the rest of us bemoan the current system in our living rooms while succumbing to the Dick Vitale-inspired Fever on our large-screens). But, y'know, a man's gotta gripe about something.

And the lack of feasible drinking water for 1.1 billion people just doesn't seem within grasp for my little mind right now.

Hmmmm....

Color us pink!

Confirmation today (unless he's really shy) is that my Mrs. Jasdye is carrying a healthy half-term bouncing (and as of last night, kicking) baby girl.

Oooh, boy. Talk about your proud papa-to-be!

Happy Casimir Pulaski Day, Comrades!

The first Monday in March is known to schoolchildren and teachers all throughout Illinois as a holiday that nobody understands.

So, thanks to Asthmatic Kitty Records for doing much indepth investigation on the man, the myth, the Casimir. As well as for posting an early demo of the Sufjan Stevens song.

Sunday Random Ten

My Little Drum - Vince Guraldi Trio. Since when didn't this album somehow land on a random list? From the opening notes, my wife cooed. I can't complain.

King Kong - L. A. Symphony. One of their most fun tracks, with a Run-D.M.C.-esque backbeat. And a bendy-saw rhythm.

He'll Do It - Fred Hammond. Not too happy with this album, his latest, Free to Worship. But then again, most of his albums (with the exception being the live one) took some time to grow on me. But there was always those two or three that thrilled me from the beginning. I'm not so sure... This song's got a definite '70s rock/soul vibe, kind of a bit of tasty bits from EW&F. Ok, maybe we'll give it some more spins.

Running to Stand Still - U2.

Bluer - Over the Rhine. "Bluer than the blue devil / Bluer than these pale angels / Bluer than all my troubles / are we gonna leave here strangers?" Sad. Potent.

Lifeboat - Steve Taylor. The clown for the CCM set did a Mrs. Doubtfire long before Medea did. Not a favorite - musically, it's painful, and then there's the non-hilarious image of a cross-dressing grown man - but the lessons about the culture-of-life and the value of all life are priceless. More of a learning skit, which it succeeds as, than a song.

Payroll for Professionals (feat. Joey the Jerk) - Pigeon John. Defitely lo-fi. There's better songs on the demo ... Is Clueless.

Black Rage - Last Poets. Yeah, it's rage-erific. "Grenades in their eyes./ and death is their prize... They are armed, standing on the corners... ready to explode at the slightest touch."

Penny Lane - The Beatles. Is on my mind...

Stuck Between Stations - The Hold Steady. See? I'm being honest about what's playing. Even if I can't stand the over-hyped crapola.

What am I Lenting? Help me to find out!

Tommorrow marks the beginning of Lent, as anyone who is a Christian and -unlike me- is not a non-denominationalist should know. (I'm guessing that Eastern Orthodox guys are all screwed up too, due to their screwy week-late Easter celebrations and all.)

But I don't know what to fast this year. Food as wholesale (even for, say, daylight) is out of the question. Maybe I can, but I tend to get short during those periods. And I don't need to get any more impatient or angry. Not at work.

Or home.

Maybe I can fast from work.

Ok, what about coffee? I didn't do any prep on that. I dunno. Sounds sketchy. I never feel like I get enough sleep.

I wonder how many wimpy Christians (like me) refrain from coffee drinking during this period. Must put Starbucks and the big coffee international corporations on a dip. They refer to Lent as "the Lean Months." I can hear trembling in an office in Seattle, "We're going to have to temporarily lay off about 1/3 of our work force for forty days. Slowly bring them back during the week after Easter."

I need to blog more, not less. So that's out of the question.

I don't watch tv, except for The Office, which I catch on my iPod.

What's your choice? What are you Lenting this year? Are you? What should I Lent?

Exsqueeze Me?!? Too religious?

A couple of weeks after reading sociologists Christian Smith's excellent piece on horrendous number-crunching by evangelicals, I come across this trite, strident piece of garbage on my Yahoo! front page. Apparently, evangelical Christians aren't the only ones playing fast and stupid with numbers, or questions. To ask, "Is America too religious?" (as the people behind this poll/blog by Yahoo and ABC News did) is extremely problematic, divisive, polemical and, let's face it, bigoted.

I'm sure we could all think of different ways to phrase that question that would expose what a fraudulent way of thinking that is.

The problem with such polemical questioning is multidimensional. At its base, firstly, it's a yes/no, either/or, question, offering a simplistic take on such a wide-range over-laying topic. You either side with religion or you don't, the question assumes. It's almost mathematical, a type of modernist dilemma. In-or-out, true-or-false. But religion is a man-made construct, a vehicle, if you may. It's like asking, 'are there too many comedies on television' (with the assumption that they're all Two and a Half Men, without acknowleging a Cosby Show, a Seinfeld, a Simpsons), 'are there too many websites on the internet' (with the assumption that most of them are hokey or pornographic, without regard to many useful blogs, uploaded literature and resource pages), 'are there too many books in the world' (with the assumption that they're all Harlequin romances) - without regard to the quality or diversity of those in question.

Secondly, the question is constructed (even with the bottle-neck yes/no at its apex) too broadly. Is the issue at hand related to politics (as suggested in the introduction - the fear of some sort of unchecked theocracy falling upon the American public by the current incarnation of the Religious Right in the White House)? To the morality struggles played out in public (think of an outed mega-church pastor and leader being 'cured' all of a sudden)? To the effects that religious morals have had on our laws and ethics (or, as Dwight Eisenhower has said, "I don't care what religion America has, we just need one.")? To personal and communal piety performed in the public square (the Amish response to the madman killer)? To daily offices? To liturgical practices? To eschatological views (Left Behind anyone? Please?)? To ecclesiology (should the nation be concerned about who are the new and next pastors?)? To ecumenicalism (the gathering of various faith-traditions)? To the perceived threat of holy wars? In other words, what aspect of America is under seige here, is under the possible threat of being too religious? And secondly, what is meant by the term 'religious'? This general vagueness is a sort of double-threat. And I could understand why people may read and respond to this vagueness in a defensive manner - whether pro or con.

Thirdly, I can't help but see the phrasing of this question as being anti-Religious, whatever that may mean. Try rephrasing this question with another topic in mind. "Has America become too terrorist-friendly"? "Has America become too baby-killer friendly"? "Has America become too racist"? "Has America become too...?" What? If the term that you imagine isn't already negative, it becomes a negative by way of association. A sort of triple threat, I suppose.

The real question should be, Are there too many idiotic and inept questions proffered by the mass media?

He's kind of like a little elf corvette

When I was in high school (with Father Abraham, of course), Prince's birthday was one of the biggest non-official holidays - the others being Valentine's Day, Halloween and, of course, International Cutting Day. Girls of all colors and creeds would unite to wear purple, and ocassionally swoon even as the Purple One himself was denying his Warners Slave Name and picking up a new symbol - based on that extra chromosome running around in his chapless genes - for his new name.

So, it seemed ironic to me that at the smallest Super Bowl party in Chicago this year, I found myself defending Prince against a couple of women. I was vastly outnumbered, but I tried to quiet my wife and hostess (not always a good idea, mind you) and educate them on the sweet goodness that was coming out of that man's guitar. Not to mention the songs, the percussion, the stripped-down production (just his old name-thingie, a handful of guitars, Sheila E.[?] on drums, a lit-up college marching band, somewhat clumsy and distracting dancers, a kerchief on his head [is he still mad at Warner?], and fireworks at the end), the lively way he cut into that guitar demonstrating that not only is his name Prince, and he is funky, but he can play the guitar just like a'ringing the bell. And it added a bit of effeminate coolness to the game (unheard of the last time the Bears played of course). But coolness, nonetheless. This is the man whose music provided Jack Nicholson's entrance in Batman, after all.

And so his version of CCR via Ike & Tina's "Proud Mary" and Dylan sans Jimi "All Along the Watchtower" may not have been perfection (the volume was, of course, low on our set, so I can't be sure), but it was a thing of beauty. I'm of course referring to the music, not Prince.

Try not to stare too hard for another NippleGate.

Then again, he was wearing Bears colors. Lovie should wear that on the sidelines next year.

I Want to be a Clone

HowManyOfMe.com

There are: 109 people with my name in the U.S.A. How many have your name?

Statistically speaking, it sounds very probable.

My wife, on the other hand, shares her name with eleven other US citizens.

Crizzapsolute!

Early on in the season, Rex Grossman looked like General Sherman, burning bridges, railroads and defensive units in his wake.

Increasingly lately, though, he's looked like General Grant. After the war. In the presidency.

If we had kept the run going, with only a few long bombs, we should have easily had that. But it's lost now.

And I'm sad.

Really sad.

The good news is, my wife still loves me. We've still got a beautiful baby on the way. And Jesus loves me as much now as 32 years ago.

It's brutally cold, so cold you have to feel alive. I have a job, so does my wife. I've got great friends who care for me. I live in friggin' Chicago, U.S. of A. I'm drinking hot cocoa. I had a gypsy skillet from Cozy Corners this afternoon. I have a full fridge. I wear clothes. I have too many shoes (much more than when I was a youth, with one pair a year). I'm in a position to help others. I'm a teacher, teaching in my dream school. It takes all of my fingers to count all of my toes - ten; no more, no less.

I guess it's not too bad.

Days like today just aren't supposed to happen

The Mrs. jasdye and I are celebrating our first six months as a married couple today (wait for it... wait for it...). That's right, it's our halfiversary!

And today is the first time our lovable Chicago Bears play in the Super Bowl in 21 years.

O, my heart is torn.

j/k

I know where my loyalty lies.

On the side where I WON'T get a rolling pin thrown at me.

And the wifey is gracious enough to watch the game with me.

So, yeah, I'm blessed, suckas!

Scrummtrilescent Chili-esque-tastic Type of Meal... Deal... ee-oh

The show was delightful. No, no. It was brilliant. No, no, no, no. There is no word to describe its perfection, so I am forced to make one up. And I'm going to do so right now: Scrumtrilescent! - Will Ferrell as film expert James Lipton on Saturday Night Live *

We had to finish off the beef last night, and I was tired of the old stand-by's: cheeseburgers, spaghetti, tacos, chili, etc. (even the scratch and Rachel Ray varieties). So, I just started putting things together. But, I think the basis is a chili recipe.

dashes of Southwestern Spice Rub
1/2 pound beef (the better the cut, the better the product, obviously)
1/2 can tomato sauce
1/2 can stewed tomatoes
4 oz beer
various spices (I used garlic salt, paprika, and sundried tomato & basil)
5 qts. water
dash of salt
sprinkle of olive oil
1/3 box of medium shells, pasta
2 oz. shredded Monterrey jack cheese

The spice rub was a homemade blend given as a Christmas gift by some friends. So, I really don't know where to get it from. But the idea is to rub it in to the meat before cooking it. Brown the meat. Add the sauce, tomatoes, and beer. Simmer for 10-15 minutes.

In a separate pan, bring water, salt and olive oil to a boil, add shells, lower heat and stir occasionally for 12 minutes (or until done. Whichever is first. Like I know). Drain. Put cheese in and cover for four minutes.

Add the extra spices to taste while simmering the meat. Put 'em all together and enjoy.

Or toss your cookies.

* H/t to Jeffrey Overstreet for that quote.

When does Mike Judge get his turn?

News is that J. J. Abrams (of Lost / Mission Impossible III: Mission Impossibler / A Very Special Felicity / Alias fame) and - to me, even better news - Joss Whedon (Buffy the Vampire Slayer, brooding Angel, Firefly and its feature movie Serenity) are set to direct episodes of The Office coming within the next couple months.

Having just screened Serenity with my wife (foolishly thinking that because it was daylight, she would not wake me up in the middle of the nights with fears of hiding or encroaching reavers) the other day, I've of course had the sadly maligned Whedon on my mind. Knowing that tv shows don't allow a lot of creativity for the director of the week, it may be nothing more than a fun lark for the two, as it seemed to be for Harold Ramis (Groundhog Day, and many movies which only distract from the brilliance that is Groundhog Day) a few months ago.

Just to be on the safe side, I won't invite my wife to watch The Office any time soon.

Music 2006 - Miscelloonyous

These albums didn't quite make the cut, but I think they deserve an honorable mention. And if not by me, than by whom?

Honorable mentions of 2006:

The Choir - O How the Mighty Have Fallen
You can almost say that again. But not quite, as this is almost a return to form for the ethereal, poetry-laden rockers. Not quite the masterpieces that were Circle Slide (one of my favorite of all time) or the heavier Speckled Bird (with an unfortunate-looking cover), yet still mighty good and solid. Old fans will cherish it, and hopefully they'll sell more copies than the extraordinary Mr. Buechner's Dream double album by Daniel Amos. If you're into spiritual expressions of life that neither pander nor preach, but rather sympathesize with saints and sinners all. But mostly sinners. "Thank you please / don't swing your shovel at my head, friend / No, I truly won't appreciate / that sound / When you tell me, I surely should / atone for my sins, / I hope you know / the fate of the proud."

Bob Dylan - Modern Times
It always takes some time for him to get through my system. I'm still figuring this one out. Which is partly why I like him. Heck, even a simple song about Noah and some animals sounds like it isn't a simple song about Noah and some animals. And this album covers redemption and brokenness like nobody's business but the prophets, which are sadly missing in Hell's Kitchen, New Orleans and in the nation's armpit. Here's looking at you, Cinci.

Danielson - Ships
He gets by with a little help from his frinds. One of the more peculiar acts in the indie scene, Daniel Smith and Co. (usually family w/ a few sidekicks - most famously Sufjan Stevens) have always played outsider artist with tree and nurse uniforms - serving as walking, styrofoam metaphors for the healing of the nations through Jesus. As to how Danielson differs from his protege's work, everything around Ships seems to urge on and further. Xylophones, piano keys, drum kits, snares, triangles, even the strumming of guitars and banjos, the whole surrounding is every bit propulsive and percussive, as if life itself is a seemingly random series of poundings that, sounded together, is positive, life-affirming and quite harmonic. Multi-layered virtual choirs don't drown out, but rather emphasize his weird screeching falsetto (for some reason, it works for me, where Brian Wilson's recent attempts don't). And there's some catchy, catchy songs on this trick.

Dissapointment of the year:
Tie:
The Roots - Game Theory
Jurrassic 5 - Feedback
Or am I just missing something? Was I just let down by past, too-superior works that these affairs just seem middling by comparison? Or are they actually, truly mediocre?

Overhyped piece of crap of the year:

The Hold Steady - Boys and Girls in America
Held steadily in late '70s/early '80s Springsteen. Every song is redundant, serving warmed over lyrics of lame parties and trying to get into some doped-up girl's pants. If my life was this boring, I'd wanna be the Boss, too. Makes me wonder what the lives of those who love this album are like? They can't all be that bad, can they?

I've got one of those nasty colds. I'm always such a wuss when it comes to this stuff. (My wife's pregnant and without sleep, carrying a splitting headache - but she endures) I stayed home today to take care of grading and all the rest, but I can barely get my head around this nasty business.

But, what can I say? My - and my town's - prayers have been answered. The Bears are going to the Super Bowl! They are WHO WE THOUGHT THEY ARE! And I'm already sick of the people at espn.com for wanting nothing to do with the Bears crushing victory, everything to do with washed-up Parcells quiting Dallas (b/c, apparently, Dallas has given up on him), and mourning the Saints' loss.

Dude! This is Chicago! We're going to the Superbowl! And only twenty-one years after our last visit! With a minority coach! Against another minority coach! History, babies!

And, once again, a proud papa city gets to watch its team embarrass the national media and its Bear-skeptical prognasticators!

Bear Down!

Now, back to grading.

Top 6 records of 2006

There is no particular order to these CD’s. The order is almost always arbitrary, and since all of these records were exceptionally good (though not spectacular), they all get equal treatment – for the most part – and a lot of spins on the old iPod.

TV on the Radio – Return to Cookie Mountain

Like my favorites from last year, Arcade Fire’s Funeral and Sufjan Stevens’ Come on, Feel the Illinoise, this was a multi-structured and -layered, genre-crosser/bender that defies industry and audience expectations. But big deal, right? Hundreds of indie releases come out every year that do the same, if not more so. The difference is, this semi-concept record (about personal – and therefore social, cultural and political – war), with its thematic riffs, ROCKS! If Peter Gabriel released a contemporary record with Genesis and some session players from Stax – who are required to mute their instruments – and kept most of the songs under five minutes, this is what it would sound like. “I was a lover / before this war.”

Pigeon John – Pigeon John and the Summertime Pool Party

“Who rocks the mic / who rocks the mic / What?” The MC who never seems to take himself seriously – after all, this is the guy who invented the Pigeon Dance (where he puts his fists on his skinny ribs, struts his pelvis forward and furiously flails his arms from the elbows back and forth) to lift up his spirits, and his audience – tackles subjects as forbidden to mainstream rap as God’s benevolence in an uncaring and dying world, lust, loneliness at the clubs, and his wife. And he does it with flair, humor, a penchant for sunny and childlike melody akin to – though not copped from – Eminem, and hooks that would do his heroes (which he’s listed as various as A Tribe Called Quest and Phil Collins) proud.

Over the Rhine – Snow Angels

“All I ever get for Christmas / is blue.” Although not the classic that Drunkard’s Prayer was last year (#3) or the double-disc Ohio before that, this has the makings of one of the classics of neo-Christmas music. As I’ve said before, the pleasant surprise is in how they’ve combined the something old – in this case, Guaraldi-inspired songs (the shuffle “Goodbye Charles” and “All I Ever Get for Christmas Is Blue”), a Marley-inspired song (“New Redemption Song”), lullabies for lovers (“Hush Now, Baby” – which, like “NRS”, combines images of the apocalyptic redemption with maternal care), and adult love songs ala “It’s Cold Outside” and “Santa, Baby” (the scandalous, Cole Porter meets R. Kelly “North Pole Man”, the retro “Snowed in with You”, as well as the rocker “Here It Is”) as well as a remake of "Jingle Bells" (“One Olive Jingle”). The resulting nostalgia is heart-warming on these cold Chicago nights, and it helps that my wife’s becoming an Over the Rhine fan. This one goes up there with the Charlie Brown Christmas album.

Ladysmith Black Mambazo – Long Walk to Freedom

Most of this isn’t new, culled as it is from Paul Simon’s Graceland and the Simon-produced Shaka Zulu. The difference is the newer production and the cameos. Fortunately, their recycling is good enough to top my list of favorite listens through the year. The joy is evident and transcendental, witnesses to God’s love, their love, and their native South Africa’s long walk to freedom.

Gnarls Barkley – St. Elsewhere

From the wordplay of the name of the group and the album, to the beautifully inspired compositions, to the soul and gospel influenced singing, to the ubiquitous thumping two-note bass-line / irresistible groove that begins the hands-down single of the year, I can’t get enough of this album. I know just about everybody else can, but they’re idiots.

Mars Ill – Pro*Pain

I was going to list this as an honorable mention. But then I listened to it one more time. Loud. I have to admit, it's a bit of a let-down after the two-year anticipation legal woes kept this album on the shelf. And although it's not as good as their other, more recent albums - I'm thinking specifically of their remix, BackWaterProphets - it still boogies, swings, bites and punches with force largely unmatched in underground hip hop. "Heaven Scrapes the Pavement" rocks the mic and "More" lets Ahmad Jones (of soul/rock/hop outfit 5th Avenue Jones) out of his cage while they all opine for justice and something more out of life than its brokenness insists is possible.

Our heavenly Papa Bear,

Who art in Halas Hall (and everywhere else),
Super Bowl champions be our name.
Superdome be come;
May your will be done
in Miami as it is in Chicago.
Give us Sunday our Devin Hester return touchdown;
And forgive us our Rex
As we forgive our Bretts;
And lead us not into temptation
As we trash the Saints -
For yours is the riots, champagne and bragging rights
for the next twenty years!

Amen

There ain't no hollaback, gurlll....

Ok, I've already done that song. It's bananas.

I've been busy trying to post out grades (which includes grading nearly everything from the last year), trying to get some sleep (good news is, I've only had to go out for a craving raid once - unless you count running across the street), dealing with a radioactive class setting (0r sometimes two) and trying to set up a schedule for next semester. I can't really complain. Everybody's fine (for the most part) and we're surrounded by good friends and good family. But I just don't seem to have enough time anymore.

I've been downloading cheesy singles recently ("Take on Me", "We Built this City on Rock & Roll", "Working for the Weekend", "Saturday Night", "Saturday Night's Allright for the Fight", "Getting Jiggy with It"). That's about it. But Micah's got the beesnix posted on his blog. We loves us some piano man.

Crown 'em

Happy Martin Luther King day.

In celebration, I'm going to Phoenix with some of my friends. Wanna tag along?
So, lemme get this straight: A man dedicates his life to the practice of non-violence to turn on the conscience of a nation. Not everybody honors his legacy. And here's a song by people who say that they'll honor his legacy by threatening the life of ignorant law-makers.

Only in America.

Turn a cheek. You just might save a life.

Marble ceiling

I don't know much about the new Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi. Yet, in terms of how sexually segregated the United States is (certainly in terms of power positions), I wish her all the best.

But to say that she's the most powerful woman in the legislature may be a just a bit underwhelming, considering Newt Gingrich's claim some 14 years ago. He claimed that the Speaker of the House - who sets the agenda for the largest legislative body (after all, for all the revisionist talk, neither the Supreme Court nor the President can actually make laws) in the most powerful nation in the world - is arguably the most powerful person in politics.

And then he proved it - for better and for worse. 

Here's to hoping Pelosi can cause some damage.  But in a positive, reinforcing way.

Does Lex Luthor know about this?

This either missed Kansas by a couple thousand miles...


or it's astronaut poop.

Either way, someone should inform the Superfriends.

Hardly on schedule / but always on time

On the second listen, I'm liking Nas' tribute/memorial to his culture, Hip Hop Is Dead. Like the Transformers, it's more than meets the eye. I regret that only now is someone at the top proclaiming the same message that backpackers and undergrounds have been ripping for well over a decade now. Yet, having Snoop over for another spit, exhorting to "Play on Playa", adds a level of complexity, if not stupidity. Same could be said for guest producer /-rapper / Michael Jackson pal / Fergie discipler Will. I. Am on the title track. (Who lays out a leftover beat from BEP's Elephunk.)

In this day of cannibalistic music trends (where, again, barely-talented teens with nothing to say run and ruin the urban radio) Nas, like Nat King Cole, wants to be remembered as "Unforgettable" too. Nas seems to want to eat and heave his cake.

Yet, for all his sparse beats, Nas ends on an a capella "Hope", with a female Greek chorus sounding out that "Hip hop will never die." "You a hustla' / you ain't a rapper / get ya paper / but this s*** is real." Even his laugh seems to condemn his old rival, now executive producer and guest MC Jay-Z (who guests on the conscience-tweaking "Black Republicans" where both boast about their money, power and connections while reflecting what that means for them as Black Americans - as well as what it means as mainstays, tops and power-brokers in the cannibalism.)

The chorus ends in a cypher-praying against the wind of radio and and self-destructive trends:

"I pray hip hop stay / live, hip hop, live / give, hip hop, give..."

The state of grace, pt. 1

There's a lady at my church that doesn't act much like a lady. At least, in regards to me and - therefore - in my estimation. In a few instances, she has very openly assaulted my character, once to me a few years ago, once to a close friend about a year ago and then again to my face less than a year ago (after we got back from a church retreat, wherein, she confessed, her opinion of me hadn't changed) and then again last week, indirectly, to my wife.

My opinions of her opinions (and, of course, extending to her) were pain-stricken and grievous. Each attack of hers (save the last one to me) brought great defense from great and well-meaning people who gave great testimonials on behalf of my character (which, I must admit, isn't always so great, but certainly not worthy of trashing). Each attack also hurt and infuriated me, to various degrees.

My conundrum raises in this topic, this key turning point of human relationships, this sphere where Jesus meets geopolitics meets the common man meets the hard heart meets the Middle East meets Northern Ireland meets Auschwitz meets the cross: forgiveness.

As little as my church puts into liturgy (sometimes much to my chagrin), in our practice of the Lord's Supper we find one important and oft-repeated rule spotted and highlighted by our pastor. If you have bitterness or unforgiveness or hatred in your heart directed at a fellow worshiper (and by this he explicitly means someone in our small church), before you take this cup, go to them and make it right.

On one of these ocassions, she eyes me, slowly makes her way up some five steps and leans to me. She confides that she never much cared for me or trusts in me (but she doesn't know why), that she had actually prayed against me (!!) and that during a recent church leaders' retreat, she didn't gain any new confidence in me.

I didn't know I was on trial.

And I didn't know (and really still don't know - nearly a year later) how to handle that. She didn't ask for forgiveness. She didn't offer it. If anything, it was opportunity for a fresh wound, a tearing of the flesh on an old knee-scraper I hadn't really considered since I originally hit the ground. So, I leaned to my friend, a big burly dude, and just flooded his shoulder with my tears. He still doesn't know what it was all about. Then again, neither do I.

This memory was violently returned a little while ago, when the same opaque charges were made against me to my wife.

I have a student at my school who does not act much like a student. From every appreciable view, he does not come into the scholastic setting to learn, to better himself, his options or his surroundings. He also does not come into the classroom to even pass time (which, unfortunately, is what many of our students do do).
He comes - from everything that I can sum up - to disrupt. Actually, to be the center of attention.

And since I am his teacher (and understandably have a desire to be that center myself) we are often at odds, often butting heads and comments. It's a grand and vulgar chess game that we play.

And I want to believe in him as much as I want to believe that every student can and should learn. I just believe he doesn't want to - he's not convinced that it is right for him, not at this stage in his life. And in the meantime, anyone who dares get in his way is his exasperated victim.

Being one of his teachers, I see him five days a week for an hour and a half a piece. His classmates, on the other hand, are surrounded by his anxious (and usually destructive and self-serving) energy for approaching five hours five days a week.

But I'm the one in power, if tenuously. And, I'm white (although he knows that I'm partially Latino). So, I'm a racist to him. Never mind that that label goes against every fiber of my being. Never mind that I've spent countless hours examining my heart and my nation's fiber in dealings with race relations. I know I should ignore it. I know that he's merely trying to goat my herd. But it hurts at a level deeper than nearly any other label can hurt. And he consistently does it.

What do I do with people that constantly hurt and then act as if they've been victimized? I know that I'm not perfect in my actions or reactions to them, but should I allow such things to be as if it's the natural and right way to interact? Should I forgive those who don't lament or acknowlege their evils? Should I continually and blindly turn my cheeks, to the extreme that my flesh may be worn and torn from my puffy face?

If you like the Beatles, then you would like TV on the Radio

I'm just getting around to listening to some late editions - possible contenders for my list of favorite albums of 06.

Tell me what you think. Anybody out there big fans - or detractors - of:

• TV on the Radio, Return to Cookie Mountain (I'm really, really digging this album.)
• The Hold Steady, Boys and Girls in America (Despite all the hype and Springsteenyness, I'm enjoying the energy on this.)
• Nas, Hip Hop Is Dead (O my. So much cursing.)
• Derek Webb, Mockingbird (I mean, besides Wasp Jerky.)

• Pigeon John, ... And the Summertime Pool Party (OK, actually this is making the list, point-blank. But I'd still like to know what people are thinking.)
• Fred Hammond, Free to Worship (It's been too long.)
• Bob Dylan, Modern Times (Had this one for awhile. But it's so long and meandering... Kind of like some of my posts.)
• The Choir, O How the Mighty Have Fallen (Circle Slide is one of my favorite albums of all time. I have a fear that this won't live up. cf. Fred Hammond.)

Just about every color but yellow works

On the other hand, the new Blogger(TM) looks conspicuosly like the old.

I'm gonna try to put some current lists on the sidebar (y'know MySpace and Xanga have easier-to-update and more picturesque list features. But then again, I don't want Blogger to be MySpace or Xanga).

I'm grading. I'll post shortly. Hopefully.

Oh, Amazon listmania here.

Feel like a gaw-danged kid here...